Dealing With an Alcoholic?

Question by Katelyn R: Dealing with an alcoholic?
I have falling deeply in love with an alcoholic. I have been dealing with him being drunk EVERY single night for the past year. I have grown very tired of this. So for New Year’s he stopped drinking. And now it is night three and he says he is going to go to the store to buy his whiskey to just drink for tonight. Do you think it is ok to tell him I am leaving him if he takes one more sip? I ask because I know alcohlism is a disease. I know no one is perfect. I figure if he takes one sip he will just want more and more. What do you think? Should I leave him if he drinks any alcohol.

Best answer:

Answer by slipknot01299
buy him nonalcoholic beer

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

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19 Responses to “Dealing With an Alcoholic?”

  • LoveLife546324:

    Therapy.

  • HappyGoLucky:

    YES. you shouldv’e left long ago.

  • Mary:

    alcoholism is serious and he isn’t ready for a relationship because alcoholics are only focused on drinking. He needs to get help

  • bmarie:

    yes tell him youll leave him if he doesnt stop… maybe seriously leave for a little bit. if not he wont take you seriously and wont stop. and if he still doesnt stop then obviously you dont mean that much to him, and if thats the case then you dont need him.

  • Sean D:

    not one more sip, but if its that serious do bring it up

  • not 2 B fooled:

    Yes you should, otherwise you are an enabler. One of the things I have suggested (in cases like yours) is to videotape the drinker and play it back when they are sober so they can see what they really are like

  • Mellymouse:

    rehab?
    Yea tell him your going to leave And that his personality changes and you can’t deal with it and you don’t want to loose him. thats it horrible for his health.

  • Sophos:

    As a recovered alcoholic for nearly 16 yrs you must leave him for the sake of your own sanity. Threatening him won’t work, frothy emotional appeal won’t work either. Get out of the relationship and let God look over him because he’ll either sober up, get locked up or get covered up. There is no human power that can help him .

  • Tellor:

    maybe he should try going to AA (alcohol anonymous)

  • geminitwin81:

    I would. Just put your foot down and tell him that drinking excessively is no longer acceptable

  • Morpheus:

    Well – if you have any brains at all, get away from him as soon as possible. Don’t bother to tell him anything – just leave. Drunks can’t hear you.

    A good book on alcoholism is “Under the Influence” – you can get it used off of Amazon.com. It’s a good realistic look at this disease.

  • Whacckkaa :DDD:

    Tell him I am not gunna give you one more chance! not again. you take one sip i am out, if you dont wanna change for your self, that means you do not want to be with me

  • One Hundred graphic details:

    YES! YES! YES!!!
    Whether he drinks or not you should leave him. He will continue to mess up your life and if you plan on having any children their lives will be ruined. Do you really want to choose to do this to your unborn children? He isn’t going to change and he has probably been sneaking liquor for the past several days as well. You can do better. Yes, we are all imperfect, but an alcoholic mate is about the worst you can get. Hurry, go, NOW!

  • Mark:

    Don’t leave him. But encourage him to get help. AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) has helped many alcoholics to stop drinking. It is a rare alcoholic indeed that can quit drinking all by themselves. Many famous and successful people attend AA meetings. You’d be surprised. AA is not full of losers.

    If he won’t quit or at least get help, then leave him. Your life together will only get worse. Much worse.

  • louis:

    If he drinks again he will fall back into alcoholic drinking in no time. You could tell him that if he wants you to stay with him he needs to not only get sober he also needs to go for help like say AA meetings.
    So if he starts drinking again and rejects your input I think I would leave, it would be a) the best thing for you to safe yourself and b) he needs to not WANT drinking more. If you were to stay while he starts drinking again you would enable him. And you would feel pretty miserable yourself.
    If his love for you is stronger than his addiction he will go for some kind of help, but it must come from within himself.
    Good luck!

  • Serene E:

    YOU ARE STUPID!!!! alcoholics are ADDICTS FOR LIFE!!!! He’ll lie,cheat, steal and murder to get DRINK!!! What don’t you understand about that???

    Go ahead and tell him you’ll leave – give the ultimatum. But if he’s an alcoholic, HE WILL DRINK AGAIN!!!

    LEAVE!!! Run away!! LEAVE!! Run Away!!

  • Jodie75:

    If you tell him this, he’ll likely feel terrible, but choose the booze.

    The problem with alcoholics is that they can’t get well for YOU. They have to come to a point where their drinking has started to affect their life in a way they can’t tolerate anymore. You leaving may be his rock bottom, but I suspect he’ll tell himself his loss of you is all the more reason to drink, because he’s a loser, etc.

    the only thing you can really do is what is right for you, instead of making it about what is right for him. And if you do stay, and allow him to drink in your house, against his wishes, it will only be enabling him.

    It’s a very tough spot to be in. It’s not unheard of that the threat of an alcoholic’s loved one leaving will make them quit, but just not very likely. I want you to be prepared with what you’re up against. Alcoholism is indeed a powerful disease, and logic doesnm’t really play into it.

    For support, I suggest you attend al-anon groups in your areas, to get support from other people whom are loved ones of alcoholics, and learn how to deal with him while at the same time looking out for yourself.

    Google for groups in your area, or look in your local yellow pages. There are on line groups you can also participate in. http://www.al-anonfamilygroups.org/meetings/meeting.html

  • BoNdOckS cLaN GaNg:

    sometimes a “alcoholic disease” can be the only words for there excuse. u know its a disease but if you let him know you understand that “to much” he may use that as a excuse and keep on cause in your eyes it is a disease, which is true but anyone can abuse words…i know its a disease…take charge…. for example..if your sister does something bad you make a deal saying “i wount tell mom if…” you keep that deal but your hold that against them as if the word “disease can be used too”… still take charge tho…