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Question by Brad Dillon: Major depression issues (cannot function)?
Hey guys, so I have a bit of mental problems here. I do not have some kind of obsession illness but I do have overly high anxiety. Here is my problem.

Professional sources have stated that it is about 5 years between people and the person must be 16 or over for them to be considered a pedophile, but i’m not sure about my situation. In no way did I break any law here, but i’m just wondering if it is immoral or if I should be considered a pedophile. I was just a stupid kid here. I do not have any feelings of attraction towards any girl three years or more younger than me. That to me is gross.

I don’t remember the exact details but i’ll try to do my best. To this day I wouldn’t date anyone more than three years below my age. When I was 14 I met a girl who was 11 online. She seemed nice and while I’m pretty positive I wasn’t attracted to her until she was 12 and I was 14, it could be possible. I believe she was turning 12 soon and I was 14. I don’t believe I did anything with her, such as flirting or something along those lines until she turned 12. I believe that this was the cutoff for me. No one 12 or younger. Actually, I’m almost confident that I met her shortly before she turned 12 and I was still 14. She had an early birthday and I had one in August.

It really started to develop when she was 12, which is when I talked to her frequently. It mostly happened when she was 12 and I was 14. Nevertheless, I then believe I turned 15 and she was still 12 and I continued it on and off. I didn’t really like her because she was extremely young, she seemed mature to me and I didn’t see anything morally wrong with it.

To this day I am haunted by the fact that this may make me a pedophile in the past. I stopped talking to her when I was 16 and she was 13, possibly turning 14 soon also. I was a growing teenager and couldn’t keep interest in someone who was still fresh into high school.

1. I’ve heard of boys being attracted to girls that are 12 twhen they are 14, and people say this is perfectly normal. Again, I AM ALMOST POSITIVE that I did not have relations with her when she was 11 and I was 14. If I did, she was almost 12 and less than 3 years younger than me. WOULD THIS MAKE ME A PEDOPHILE?

2. If I continued to have relations with her when I was 15 and she was 12, does this make me a pedophile or was I stuck into that relationship? Like mentioned before, the actual stats are that it was likely less than 3 years. I cut it off as soon as possible when I turned 16. DOES THIS MAKE ME A PEDOPHILE?

3. Are these feelings normal of dating someone within 3 years of your age?

I know it’s unmoral at some section, but is it actually make me a full fledged pedophile in the past? I am currently 17 and haven’t dated a girl younger than 14 while i’ve been 17.
Don’t prescribe me medicine, I need actual help.

Best answer:

Answer by Jody
No, not according to the definition. “Pedophilia is the act or fantasy on the part of an adult of engaging in sexual activity with a child or children.”

As a medical diagnosis one has to be 16 years old or older and have a primary or exclusive interest in prepubescent children (13 and under) to have the psychiatric diagnosis of pedophilia.

An adolescent who is 16 or older must be at least 5 years older than the prepubescent child before the attraction can be diagnosed as pedophilia.

Child-on-child sexual abuse is when a prepubescent child is sexually abused by one or more other children or adolescent youths. It’s described as sexual activity between children that occurs “without consent, without equality, or as a result of coercion.”

There is an element of overt and deliberate actions directed at sexual stimulation. In many cases, the initiator exploits the other child’s naivete, and the victim in unaware of the nature of what is happening to them.

So if you used physical force, threats, trickery or emotional manipulation to get cooperation, you’re guilty of child on child sexual abuse. If you didn’t, you’re guilty of nothing.

Children who wwere sexually victimized by other minors show largely the same problms as children victimized by adults; anxiety disorders, depression, substance abuse, suicide, eating disorders, ptsd, sleep disorders, difficulty trusting peers in relationships, and revictimizaiton in later life.

Primary sexual interest in 11-14 year olds is hebephilia.

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